Sean Kelly, Franchise Truth founder & publisher of UnhappyFranchisee.Com, is reinventing the traditional folk music protest song to inform & warn Veterans about the risks associated buying a JDog Junk Removal & Hauling or JDog Carpet Cleaning & Floor Care franchise. “Where Have All the JDogs Gone” and “JDog Franchise Blues” pay homage to the Veteran owners of the 300 franchises currently missing in action.
Parody folksinger Sean Kelly writes humorous songs and creates unique videos using a free, long-discontinued editing program called Moviemaker.
Asked to describe his songwriting style, Kelly says “Imagine that Woody Guthrie and Ralph Nadar had a love child, and they hired Mark Twain as its au paire.”
Usually recorded in one (or fewer) takes, Kelly’s songs get the intended results.
One day in 2015, Kelly had been blogging in support of the unfair termination of Indian-American franchisees by the Japanese-owned 7-Eleven Corporation.
That evening, he worked up on an arrangement of the Merle Travis coal mining classic “Sixteen Tons.”
“I went to bed with both of those subjects swirling around in my head,” says Kelly. “During the night, they gelled and I woke up with a full set of lyrics in my head. I quickly typed them out and recorded the a capella version before my voice had a chance to wake up. It took maybe 20 minutes total.”
In 2015, His a capella reimagining of the Tennessee Ernie Ford classic “Sixteen Tons” was featured in the Australian Broadcast Corporation’s (ABC’s) Four Corners expose on 7-Eleven wage theft.
That documentary (which also featured Kelly’s investigative journalism) sent shockwaves through the Australian business community, prompted new regulations and resulted in the ouster of high-ranking government officials.
Unhappy Franchisee.Com & Sean Kelly 7-Eleven Documentary Excerpt
7-ELEVEN Franchise Blues – A Protest Song
Gordon Lightfoot Parody Helped Ouster Sex-Offender Mayor of Two Harbors, Minnesota
In 2022, citizens of Two Harbors, MN reached out to Kelly. Their self-dealing Mayor Christopher Swanson owned, among other businesses, a franchise industry digital marketing company named PureDriven.
Swanson was accused of having taken over the small picturesque town and steered government contracts for his own gain. He was trying to amass millions of dollars in public and private funds for an outlandish plan to build an underwater luxury resort under the frigid and turbulent waters of Lake Superior. Swanson had partnered with a shady character who claimed to be a reclusive billionaire named Mr. O.
As Two Harbors was one town from where the freighter Edmund Fitzgerald had launched its ill-fated voyage, Kelly rewrote Gordon Lightfoot’s classic “The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald” to dramatize the likely outcome an underwater resort in waters famous for never giving up its dead.
Kelly’s parody song & video “The Wreck of the Hotel Chris Swanson” got airplay in Duluth and accolades in Two Harbors, where citizens were calling for Swanson’s resignation.
In honor of Swanson’s backer, reclusive billionaire & podcaster Mr. O, Kelly performed as the “reclusive folk singer Boney Fingers”
After Kelly’s humorous song aired, he was contacted by the family of a girl Swanson had sexually assaulted when he was a teen and she was just five years old.
Several other women came forward to say that they, too had been sexually abused by Swanson – incidents the powerful mayor had been able to kept hidden.
Kelly worked with the victims and their families to publicly confront Mayor Swanson & inform voters of his past.
The residents of Two Harbors voted to remove Christopher Swanson as mayor – a first in Minnesota politics.
The Wreck of the Hotel Chris Swanson (Parody Song & Video)
Mix108 Interview Sean Kelly on Wreck of the Hotel Chris Swanson parody
Jerry & Tracy Flanagan sold more than 400 JDog Junk Hauling & JDog Carpet Cleaning franchises to Veterans & Military families.
More than 300 of those franchises have never been heard from again.
They’re missing in action.
Where are the JDog 300?
“Where Have All the JDogs Gone?” is a parody of the 1960s Vietnam era anti-war protest song “Where Have All The Flowers Gone.”
“Where Have All The Flowers Gone” was written by Pete Seeger and recorded, most notably, by Peter, Paul & Mary.
“Where Have All the JDogs Gone?” is an original work written & performed by folksinger Sean Kelly.
Where Have All the JDogs Gone?
Where Have All the JDogs Gone?
Long time passing.
Where Have All the JDogs Gone?
Long Time ago.
Where Have All the JDogs Gone?
Out of business every one…
When will they ever learn?
When will they ever learn?
Why do they keep selling then?
Long time passing.
Why do they keep selling then?
Long Time ago.
Why do they keep selling then?
They’re getting rich exploiting Vets
When will they ever learn?
When will they ever learn?
Why has no one stopped them yet?
Long time passing.
Why has no one called bullshit?
Long Time ago.
Why has no one stopped them yet?
Perhaps nobody gives a shit…
When will they ever learn?
When will they ever learn?
Where has all their money gone?
Jerry & Tracy Flanagan?
Where has all their money gone?
To Julip & Chris Debbas?1
Where has all their money gone?
Terry, Kev & Tom2 got some…
When will they ever burn?
When will they ever burn?
1 Reference to JDog investor & Chairman Chris Debbas & Berwyn PA-based Julip Run Capital
2 References to Terry Corkery (President of Business Development – JDog Brands), Kevin Kopa (President & COO – JDog Junk Removal & Hauling), and franchise attorney Tom Spadea (Spadea Lignana Franchise Attorneys)
“JDog Franchise Blues” is a parody of the traditional folk song “Deep Ellem Blues.”
“Deep Ellem Blues” (originally “Georgia Black Bottom” & “Deep Elm Blues”) was recorded as early as 1923 and has been covered many times, most notably by Doc Watson, Jerry Garcia, the Grateful Dead & Levon Helm.
“Where Have All the JDogs Gone?” is an original work written & performed by folksinger Sean Kelly.
JDog Franchise Blues
JDog Franchise Blues
If you go down to JDog
Keep your money in your shoes
The Veterans down at JDog
Got them JDog franchise blues…
Oh sweet Mama… Daddy’s got them JDog blues.
Oh sweet Mama… Daddy’s got them JDog franchise blues.
If you go down to Berwyn1
To JDog HQ
Have your life saving’s ready
Your credit score too…
Oh sweet Mama… Daddy’s got them JDog blues.
Oh sweet Mama… Daddy’s got them JDog franchise blues.
Once I knew a Veteran
Survived a bomb or two
He bought a JDog franchise
His surviving days are through…
Oh sweet Mama… Daddy’s got them JDog blues.
Oh sweet Mama… Daddy’s got them JDog franchise blues.
I once had a Harley
And a brand new SUV
I bought a JDog franchise
I got no pot to pee… in
Oh sweet Mama… Daddy’s got them JDog blues.
Oh sweet Mama… Daddy’s got them JDog franchise blues.
If you go down to Berwyn
To Discovery Day2
Enjoy your last free dinner
And then you’ll have to pay
Oh sweet Mama… Daddy’s got them JDog blues.
Oh sweet Mama… Daddy’s got them JDog franchise blues.
I dodged the rooftop snipers
Survived the IEDs
Smoothtalking Jdog salesmen
Will be the death of me…
Oh sweet mama, Daddy’s got them JDog blues
Oh sweet mama, Daddy’s got them JDog franchise blues
If someone advertises
On t-shirts trucks and arms3 that
You can trust him with your money
Sound the big alarms…
Oh sweet Mama… Daddy’s got them JDog blues.
Oh sweet Mama… Daddy’s got them JDog franchise blues.
Don’t listen to the haters
Don’t listen to me
Just read the Item 20
In the JDog FDD4…
1 Berwyn, PA, Home of JDog Brands Home Office
2 “Discovery Day” is the franchise sales event used to sell high-failure rate, mostly doomed franchise investments to Veterans & their families. Discovery Days culminate in a lavish, overly expensive dinner at Creed’s or Morton’s Steakhouse, paid for with the last remnants of taxpayer-guaranteed SBA loans of fallen Veteran franchisees
3 One tactic of Jerry Flanagan’s JDog misinformation campaign is to communicate sincerity & trustworthiness with embroidered shirts, t-shirts, truck decals & even arm tattoos of such slogans as “Respect. Integrity. Trust.” As the saying goes, “The secret to sales is Sincerity. Once you can fake that, the rest is easy!”
4 A Franchise Disclosure Document (FDD) is an FTC-required document franchise sellers must provide to prospective franchisees 10 days prior to signing a franchise agreement. “Item 20” is the section that shows how many franchises were sold, opened, terminated, closed or were transferred to new owners in the previous 3 years. JDog Franchise Disclosure Documents Item 20s (updated yearly) reveal 3-year turnover rates in the 80%-100% range, as Sean Kelly documents in his “The JDog Report.”
The JDog Report will provide a concise but thorough briefing and source material to facilitate accurate national & local media of a problem facilitated, in large part, by “fake news.”
Finally, The JDog Report provides Veterans, military families and other opportunity seekers education, insights and guidance on how to find the best, and avoid the worst, franchise opportunities, the need for professional due diligence of franchise & business opportunities, and the consequences of trust without adequate scrutiny.
“The JDog Report: An Urgent Call to End the Exploitation of Veterans in Franchising” is currently a 50+ page draft in the final editing & fact-checking stage. Your contribution will accelerate completion and widespread distribution for maximum impact.
Corporate & non-profit sponsors and individual contributors of $250 or more will receive a pre-publication preview and exclusive updates on the Franchise truth for Veterans initiative.
Contribute to “The JDog Report: An Urgent Call to End the Exploitation of Veterans in Franchising”
URL: https://gofund.me/b19b1931
Franchise Truth & Franchise Truth for Veterans Initiative
There is currently no meaningful oversight or enforcement of franchise laws over the claims & representations franchise sellers tell trusting Veterans & other opportunity seekers.
Some of the most predatory franchise sellers are allowed to pass off high-failure rate franchise investments as “Veteran-Friendly” franchises by virtue of their inclusion of deceptive “Best Franchises for Veterans” lists or endorsements by seemingly reputable organizations, like the International Franchise Association’s VetFran program.
Our initial analysis of more than 100 franchises currently promoted to Veterans through the VetFran program revealed that approximately 25% have 3-year franchisee turnover/attrition rates of more than 50%.
That indicates that a high percentage of Veterans being encouraged to invest in these “Veteran-Safe” franchise opportunities will not only lose their investments, savings, credit ratings, & perhaps their homes, some may lose the security clearances that gave them access to the good-paying government and contracting jobs they had prior to their franchise investment.
Contributions to the Franchise Truth & Franchise Truth for Veterans initiatives save countless Veterans from under-informed investment decisions.
Contribute to: Franchise Truth & Franchise Truth for Veterans Initiative
URL: https://www.unhappyfranchisee.com/support-franchise-fairness/
THIS IS YOUR OPPORTUNITY TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE. WHAT DO YOU THINK? SHARE A COMMENT BELOW.
Documentation & More Information:
Franchise Warning: JDog Junk Hauling for Veterans (Index)
JDOG Franchise Dream Ends in Veteran Suicide, Double Homicide
JDog Franchise News & Discussion Newsletter Sign-Up
List of JDog Franchisees With Closed or Failed Franchises – UPDATED
OPEN INVITATION: Unhappy Franchisee extends an open invitation to all those discussed to provide corrections, explanations, clarifications and/or rebuttals. We will correct factual errors & alternative views fairly. Anonymous or signed comments are welcome below or can be emailed in confidence to UnhappyFranchisee[at]Gmail[dot]com.
Contact the author at UnhappyFranchisee[at]Gmail[dot]com
TAGS: JDog, JDog fundraiser, Jdog GoFundMe, JDog Franchise, JDog litigation, JDog lawsuits, JDog suing Franchisees, Jdog veterans franchise, Jerry Flanagan Tracy Flanagan, Kevin Kopa, Terry Flanagan, Christopher Debbas, Tom Spadea, Spadea Lignana, Pedro Barnes, Kelly Barnes, Franchise Truth, Franchise Truth for Veterans, Veteran franchise, Franchises for veterans, Franchise Failure Rates
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